How To Identify Book Coaching Clients Who Are Not Open to Coaching
How To Identify Book Coaching Clients Who Are Not Open to Coaching
A simple approach to a definitive answer
One of the most important lessons I teach book coaches is how to identify red-flag clients — the kind of writers who would be a problem for you, for me, and for anyone.
No one should work with a writer who is going to be rude, demanding, condescending, arrogant, sexist, racist, or impatient, and a good client intake process is designed to help you recognize these behaviors so you can filter out these writers before you waste your time.
Here are a few examples of the red-flag behaviors I mean:
Do you invite potential clients to fill out an intake form (so you can get a sense of their goals and their project) — and someone decides they can’t be bothered?
Do you ask for a 250-word description of their book (so you can get a sense of the story and the writing and also sneak in a test of whether or not the person reads and follows directions) — and someone sends you 2,500 words or 250,000?
Do you clearly state your prices on your website (so you know if people can afford your rates or not before you take time to speak with them) — and someone hasn’t even gone there?
Do you clearly state your book coaching philosophy and the outcomes you can help writers meet — and someone asks if you can guarantee an ROI on their investment, a 6-figure book deal, and a movie deal?
Do you clearly state your process for guiding a writer through the transformation they seek in their work — and someone suggests a different way?
Do you work on designing a cohesive and coherent intake process — and someone ignores it, requests that you just hop on a call, and sends their cell phone number?
Every book coach needs to be on the lookout for these red-flag behaviors because you must keep these kinds of writers out of your business. They will suck your energy and your soul.
But to maintain the health of your business, you must also be on the lookout for a more insidious problem, which is clients who are closed off to being coached.
Closed Off to Coaching
This kind of writer is not coming in hot with alarming behaviors. They may follow every step of your intake process according to plan and may lull you into thinking they would be great to work with.
But they don’t really want to learn to be a better writer or to make their work-in- progress the best it can be. They are not looking for creative collaboration or an honest exchange of ideas and possibilities. They don’t want to work hard. All they want is validation that what they have already written is ready for prime time.
In other words, they are closed off to coaching and when the going gets tough with a book project (as the going so often does), they are going to fight you or blame you.
When you suggest (with evidence and compassion) that something in their book needs more work, they are going to say that you don’t know what you are talking about.
When you point (with evidence and compassion) to a part of the story where the logic doesn’t hold, they are going to say that their writing group loved the part.
When you suggest (with evidence and compassion) that the best way forward might be to significantly rewrite portions of the book, they are going to say that they didn’t hire you to give them bad news.
You are going to be left reeling, doing damage-control, and wondering what on earth went wrong.
Solve This Problem With Two Simple Questions
To identify writers who are closed off to being coached, add two questions to your intake process. Ask:
1. Who have you already shown this work to and what was their reaction?
This is a great question for discussing the concept of coachability. It often shows you that the client is not open.
The answer to this question might be something like, “No one. I have been locked in a garret for ten years and you are the first person I have dared to share my pages with.” This statement would warrant some follow-up: “Why did you decide now is the right time to emerge? Why did you select me to trust with this precious moment? Why do you say “dared” — have you had a bad experience with feedback in the past?”
The answer could be, “Yes, I paid for fourteen agents to review my opening pages at speed dating events at writing conferences over the past five years and every one of them said that my choice of genre made no sense but I am doing some cutting-edge genre mashup structural voodoo and they clearly just don’t get it.” In response to this statement, you would want to ask why they believe your reaction might be different and whether or not they have considered that an agent and a traditional publishing path might not be the right path for them.
The answer might be, “I show all my work to my mother and she said this is the best novel she’s read in ten years.” You would want to ask some follow-up questions to this statement: Is your mother a writer? An editor? An agent? A book reviewer? Is she your ideal reader? Do you share your work with any other potential readers?
Of course, the answer might show you that the person is ready and willing to be coached. It might be something that gives you a window into the writer’s process and where you fit into it, which gives you insight into whether or not they would be a good fit for your coaching.
The answer might be, “Yes, I have a wonderful critique partner with whom I have been sharing work for four years. I’m eager to work with a professional at this stage of the process.”
The answer might be, “No — I’m terrified to do that. I’m writing something that’s a big departure for me, which is why I’m seeking coaching. I need the perspective of a professional who hasn’t read my other work.”
The answer might be, “Yes, my agent read the manuscript and suggested that I work with a book coach to get the proposal into polished shape.”
2. Why do you think I’m the best person to help you with this project?
This question is critical. It will give you insight into the writer’s decision-making process, their goals, and their expectations.
The answer could be, “Because Tilly Tisdale worked with you and said your process was professional, inspiring, and worth every penny. I admire Tilly and the way she works commits to excellence and I aspire to work with that kind of intention, too.” This answer gives you a lot of good news.
The answer could be, “I don’t know yet if you are. I’m interviewing four other coaches who seem to be in alignment with my philosophy of revision and your recent post on how to plan a revision convinced me to put you on the list. I look forward to our conversation to learn more.” This is a wonderful response! You know what the conversation is going to be about and that this writer is serious enough about their work to take the time to bring the right people into their creative process.
The answer could be, “I heard you on a podcast and really loved the way you talked about habits and the writing process. I realized that I could use some help with my habits so wanted to learn more about how you work.” This is a great start.
These examples are all positive. But you could get some answers to this question that are not. For example:
The answer could be, “I’m not sure you are. I’m hoping you’ll prove it,” which is very different from the iteration of this answer above.
The answer could be, “Because you got Tilly Tisdale a million-dollar deal and I want one too,” which is a red flag answer.
The answer could be, “Chat GPT said you were a top book coach.” This just happened to me. A first! I was flattered! But also… it’s not a real reason. And if someone is that dependent on AI to find a book coach, I would be nervous about how they are generating the text of their book
Saying NO Leads the Way to Saying YES
When you take the time to filter out red-flag clients and clients who are closed to coaching, you are making room for your ideal clients — the ones who need exactly what you are offering, are eager to learn from you, happy to pay for a transformative experience, and aware of the role of luck and timing in the publishing process.
An Invitation: Free Writing Summit
There’s a free writing summit coming up October 21 to 24 from the folks at Write Anyway and there are *nine* Author Accelerator Certified Book Coaches giving presentations — and also me. This is a great chance to learn from some very accomplished teachers, writers, and coaches.
My offering for the Write Anyway Summit is a conversation with summit organizer Sue Campbell on The Surprising Power of Asking for Help. We dig deep into the reasons why it’s so hard for writers to ask for help and how a book coach can help a writer build trust in the process of letting other people into their creative process. My presentation includes a free download of The Writer’s Universe of Support — a simple but powerful tool I made to help writers figure out who to go to to ask for help with their writing, and who to avoid.
You can sign up for the summit HERE.
There is also a VIP All Access Pass for sale that gives you more time to watch all the content, which you can purchase as soon as you sign up using the link above. There are a lot of bonus giveaways that will come from that All Access Pass purchase — including a free download of my Blueprint books. Note that if you use that link above, Author Accelerator will earn a % from the All Access Pass sign-ups.
Great advice for all coaches and consultants!
So good!